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We change, not because we seek transformation or enlightenment, but because what we’ve been doing doesn’t work.
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The world we live in is twisted and broken and for your entire life you will be subjected to all kinds of lies that tell you that you are not enough. You are not thin enough. You are not tan enough. You are not smooth, soft, shiny, firm, tight, fit, silky, blonde, hairless enough. Your teeth are not white enough. Your legs are not long enough. Your clothes are not stylish enough. You are not educated enough. You don’t have enough experience. You are not creative enough.
There is a beauty industry, a fashion industry, a television industry, (and most unfortunately) a pornography industry: and all of these have unique ways of communicating to bright young women: you are not beautiful, sexy, smart or valuable enough.
You must have the clarity and common sense to know that none of that is true. None of it.
You were created for a purpose, exactly so. You have innate value. You are loved more than you could ever comprehend; it is mind-boggling how much you are adored. There has never been, and there will never be another you. Therefore, you have unique thoughts to offer the world. They are only yours, and we all lose out if you are too fearful to share them.
You are beautiful. You are valuable. You are enough.
Kate Elizabeth Conner
Ten Things I Want To Tell Teenage Girls
March 25, 2012 in Blog
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Hard Life with Memory by Wisława Szymborska | The New York Review of Books →
My Mom shared a new poet, and poem with me today. Took my breath away.
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Try to see this tension, this knot, this pain as a friend and not as an enemy – a friend who has come to draw your attention to something; a friend who will not go away just because you are in a bad mood, one that takes the time to help you uncover the root of the problem.
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The minute I heard my first love story I started looking for you, not knowing how blind that was. Lovers don’t finally meet somewhere. They’re in each other all along.
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For every girl who is tired of acting weak when she is strong,
there is a boy tired of appearing strong when he feels vulnerable.
For every boy who is burdened with the constant expectation of knowing everything,
there is a girl tired of people not trusting her intelligence.
For every girl who is tired of being called over-sensitive,
there is a boy who fears to be gentle, to weep.
For every boy for whom competition is the only way to prove his masculinity,
there is a girl who is called unfeminine when she competes.
For every girl who throws out her E-Z-Bake oven,
there is a boy who wishes to find one.
For every boy struggling not to let advertising dictate his desires,
there is a girl facing the ad industry’s attacks on her self esteem.
For every girl who takes a step toward her liberation,
there is a boy who finds the way to freedom a little easier.
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The Tutu’s Tale: A Cultural History Of Ballet’s ‘Angels’
Ms. HOMANS: One of the great ballerinas once told me: When you start to have a dialogue in your head when you’re performing, that’s when you know it’s going wrong. In a way, you want to get rid of those words and sort of enter a kind of different way of existing for the time that you’re on stage. So instead of thinking about…
GROSS: A way of thinking about your music and movement?
Ms. HOMANS: That’s right. You know, so instead of thinking about what you’re going to have for dinner that night, which you could do because dancers know their steps so well, and they are so second nature that your mind can wander. But, you know, to sort of shift into another dimension, as it were, so that you’re not thinking about that, but you’re in a kind of close synchrony with music.
…
GROSS: If there was an authoritarian side to Balanchine’s company it sounds like there was also a very spiritual side. He was Russian Orthodox and you say that partly because of his faith, he believed that music and dance were sacred arts and that one finds God through the senses. Did you experience that when you were dancing?
Ms. HOMANS: Oh, very much so. I mean that was the - that was the reason to dance, and that’s the main thing that one experienced on a sort of daily basis. You know, there is something almost religious about ballet and about being a dancer. It’s a commitment, the ritual of going to class everyday, of being with people and performing these great works. And when you work very hard and you achieve a kind of coordination and skill in the body, there is a way in which it sets you free. And, you know, if you’re doing these beautiful movements to music and you manage to get it all right, which doesn’t happen all the time, but when you do, it is an extraordinary and transcendent experience.
GROSS: And you say that Balanchine had this uncompromising emphasis on now, not holding back, doing it all, giving your all now. What did that mean for you as a dancer?
Ms. HOMANS: You know, as a dancer it was really a kind of concentration. It’s much harder than it sounds to focus your energy now and not be thinking about what I’m going to do in five minutes or in five hours or what happened before and was it OK or, you know, so-and-so made me angry or wasn’t that a nice thing for them to say, to just put everything aside, focus on this movement here, now and really sort of throw your full self into it, in a way that’s not just throwing but intelligent, is quite a discipline. So, you know, there was that side of it.
Jennifer Homans on Fresh Air interviewed by Terry Gross
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The word pretty is unworthy of everything you will be, and no child of mine will be contained in five letters. You will be pretty intelligent, pretty creative, pretty amazing, but you will never be merely “pretty.”
Katie Makkai
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Relationships are all there is. Everything in the universe only exists because it is in relationship to everything else. Nothing exists in isolation. We have to stop pretending we are individuals that can go it alone.
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Signs and Symptoms of Inner Peace
- Frequent overwhelming episodes of appreciation
- Contented feelings of connectedness with others and nature
- An increasing tendency to let things happen rather than make them happen
- An increased susceptibility to love extended by others and the uncontrollable urge to extend it
- A tendency to think and act spontaneously rather than on fear based on past experiences
- A loss of interest in interpreting the actions of others
- An unmistakable ability to enjoy each moment
- A loss of interest in judging other people
- A loss of interest in judging self
- A loss of interest in conflict
- A loss of ability to worry
—Saskia Davis
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